Buy yourself roses when no one else will. Remind yourself you are beautiful, you are loved. Even if its only by yourself.
Sorry baby, but this feels like a break up.
When you leave, take everything with you. Tie up all the loose ends. Because its going to be a while if you’re ever together again. But Do Not go back just because you get lonely. Only go back if you can’t go forward. But me, I’m going forward. I’m going to try.
I’m not sure he knows I really even broke up with him yet. But I’m sure that he has the idea. He won’t be home for a week and when he returns, his world will be as he left it. Except in tiny ways, ways he might not even notice; I’ll be gone. I really don’t think it matters much to him though either way. And that’s why I had to leave. Because I started not to matter as much to him.
If there is one good think about baddie grannie winkle out there – don’t think you have a wordpress, but holla.- Its that I learned I am a pink fucking starburst. And I should always be treated like a pink starburst. I’ve been feeling like a yellow one lately. And that’s gotta change. Hell, by the way he’s been looking at me I might as well be an orange starburst. A fucking purple one if they had it.
Actually, I love purple. But anyways that’s not the point.
The point here is that, your standards for who you love should be high. If someone drops the ball – yells at you til 3 am about band practices, ever invalidates your feelings by calling them ‘fucking ridiculous’ or EVER says something like “I used to like you a lot more before you started talking so much.” Girl, YOU LEAVE.
You pack up all your shit while they’re at work. Say goodbye, clean his dishes like he asked you to, take that $40 he offered you for doing them; you fill up your little free weed containers, keep the key to his house in case you need more, and you hightail your pretty little tight ass straight outta there.
Because for as fu$king crazy as men think women’s emotions are – they are just as much real as they might seem ridiculous. When I ask you to just hold my hand more, or like say nice things once in a while. That’s not really hard. I’ve had guys write me poems and love letters and drive through the night to come see me. Maybe I’ve been spoiled? No. I’ve been treated like a golden fucking goddess of love. And I earn it.
There is so much love that I just want to give, but when I don’t get it back it gets tiring.
Don’t wear yourself down for anyone. Not even if they can give you all the free weed you could ever smoke. Nothing is worth settling for less than you deserve.
Ah, but alas. Every relationship still serves a purpose. And I think this purpose might play out a little bit longer than this blog entry. But no matter what I will not back down. I will stay posted up here on my pretty little pedestal until I’m wooed to come down. Because if you’ve ever been knocked down, torn down, or beat off it – you know how hard the climb back up it can be. And that’s a path I’ve taken just a bit too many times.
Roses are red, money is green
Boy are stupid and girls are mean.